Taking Care of You Joan Weinstein, L.C.S.W If you’re traveling with small children, first secure your oxygen and then assist your children. Most parents have heard that announcement while traveling on airplanes and their inclination would be to assist their children first, before they help themselves. But the truth is that we can’t truly care for our children if we don’t care for ourselves. That translates to the fact that parents have to nourish themselves to have the physical and emotional fortitude to do the very hard work of raising our children.
Of course, parenting can be very rewarding. But it does take a lot of energy. So parents need to consider: Where are your sources of support? What are your needs and who can help you meet them? You need time to step back and to nurture yourself. You might need a time to chat with other adults, time to recharge your relationship with a significant other and time to consider your own emotional reactions to your children. Parents also might want time to consider whether you’re being the kind of parent you want to be.
Children are keen observers of the adults in their lives. Your modeling of caring for yourself will help them through the years. Remember that making the effort to carve out some time for yourself is another way that you take care of your children.
Joan Weinstein , LCSW, is director of family services at Variety Child Learning Center in Syosset.
Helping Ourselves
Don’t be afraid to ask others for a little help. Sometimes relatives or friends can give you respite or help out for a brief time so you can have a break. Sometimes it only takes a short time: a walk, an uninterrupted cup of coffee or chat on the telephone to help you feel renewed.
Try to both eat healthy foods and sleep regularly. If your child doesn’t sleep well, try to get someone to help out while you nap. Getting adequate rest and nutrition will support your immune system and help ward off illness.
Some parents find that writing and keeping a journal is relaxing. It can be a useful tool for your own reflections.
Exercise, yoga, meditation are all stress reducers and can help you in your goal of self-care.
Talk with other parents through support groups.
Resources
Adelphi University Institute for Parenting: 516-877-3060
North Shore Child and Family Guidance Center Right
from the Start: 516-484-3175
National Association of Mothers’ Centers: 877-939-MOMS
Parenting Resource Network Warmline: 516-240-601
